Lesson 1

Social Support

The various types of assistance that people receive from others, including emotional support, career or academic guidance, and practical help. Here are some examples of social support.

Emotional Support can be listening when you have a personal or private issue that is worrying you, or spending time with you when you feel down or stressed out.

Tangible Support is when someone lends or gives you something you need, or pitches in to help you with something you need to do. For example, someone runs an errand for you, lends you money, food, or clothes, or drives you somewhere you need to go.

Informational Support is giving advice or information, like helping you figure out where to get something or how to do something you need to do.
Examples of information support are guidance counseling, helping with a financial aid application, or giving you a recommendation/job reference letter.

Companionship is getting together with someone and to relax or have fun, often over shared interests. Examples of companionship are getting lunch together between classes, and playing soccer together on the weekends.

Social Capital

Social capital refers to the networks of relationships between an individual and other people that allow the individual to be more successful. Collectively, all of the individuals in your life who provide different types of social support constitute your social capital. Here are some examples of social capital at work.

Emotional Support can be listening when you have a personal or private issue that is worrying you, or spending time with you when you feel down or stressed out.

Tangible Support is when someone lends or gives you something you need, or pitches in to help you with something you need to do. For example, someone runs an errand for you, lends you money, food, or clothes, or drives you somewhere you need to go.

Informational Support is giving advice or information, like helping you figure out where to get something or how to do something you need to do.
Examples of information support are guidance counseling, helping with a financial aid application, or giving you a recommendation/job reference letter.

Companionship is getting together with someone and to relax or have fun, often over shared interests. Examples of companionship are getting lunch together between classes, and playing soccer together on the weekends.

Conflict Resolution Strategies

Ccheck out the “Conflict Resolution Strategies” sheet in your  in your Connected Futures Toolbox for some skills and resources for resolving conflict.

Lesson 2

Relationships Come in All Forms

Relationships can come in all different forms. Some are close relationships with people you see often. Some might be with people who see or talk to only occasionally, but you still value your relationship with them. And some can even be tense or marked by conflict. Click on the bubbles below to learn more about different types of relationships you can have with your social supports.

Emotional Support can be listening when you have a personal or private issue that is worrying you, or spending time with you when you feel down or stressed out.

Tangible Support is when someone lends or gives you something you need, or pitches in to help you with something you need to do. For example, someone runs an errand for you, lends you money, food, or clothes, or drives you somewhere you need to go.

Informational Support is giving advice or information, like helping you figure out where to get something or how to do something you need to do.
Examples of information support are guidance counseling, helping with a financial aid application, or giving you a recommendation/job reference letter.

Companionship is getting together with someone and to relax or have fun, often over shared interests. Examples of companionship are getting lunch together between classes, and playing soccer together on the weekends.

Eco-Map Worksheet

You can find an eco-map worksheet in your Connected Futures Toolbox. As your social capital shifts or grows over time, return to this tool to help you map out areas for improvement.

Evaluate your Eco-Map

That’s OK, that’s exactly what this program is for. Many students begin college needing to gain more relationships with adults and peers. This program was created to assist students create all different types of relationships, so let’s keep going!

It’s great you have so many strong ties in your life! It’s important that you have a lot of support, but it’s just as crucial to create relationships with other adults that can help you with career advice, research experience or academic needs. As we go through the lessons, think about ways to reach out to people who could serve as weak ties and help you with things like academic support or choosing a career.

It’s great that you have access to weak ties—that will serve you well as you navigate college. Creating stronger relationships with adults who can support you is one of the main parts of all of our lessons. As we go through the lesson plans, really focus on which adults you could potentially feel comfortable going to for encouragement or personal advice.

College is a stressful time, and it can be even harder when you’re dealing with stressful relationships. As you go through the lesson plans, try to focus on building stronger relationships with adults you feel comfortable going to for personal advice—they may be able to help you with ongoing conflict in other relationships. If you’re interested, check out the “Conflict Resolution Strategies” sheet in your Toolbox for some skills and resources for resolving conflict.

Why Network?

Networking is critical to expanding your social support and social capital in lots of ways. Networking can you help you decide what academic or career paths you’re even interested in—you might not realize, until you talk with other people who are currently working in a particular field—that it’s not a good fit for you after all!

Networking in the field you are interested in can also help you learn more about career options in that field. You might be surprised to discover what jobs a certain degree program can create opportunities for down the road.

And finally, people you meet through networking can help you in the future—providing you with letters of recommendation or serving as references, opening doors to internships and job opportunities you wouldn’t have known about otherwise, offering advice about how to be successful, and much more.

Read through several examples of the different ways that networking may be useful to a college student as they progress throughout their college years below.

Emotional Support can be listening when you have a personal or private issue that is worrying you, or spending time with you when you feel down or stressed out.

Tangible Support is when someone lends or gives you something you need, or pitches in to help you with something you need to do. For example, someone runs an errand for you, lends you money, food, or clothes, or drives you somewhere you need to go.

Informational Support is giving advice or information, like helping you figure out where to get something or how to do something you need to do.
Examples of information support are guidance counseling, helping with a financial aid application, or giving you a recommendation/job reference letter.

Companionship is getting together with someone and to relax or have fun, often over shared interests. Examples of companionship are getting lunch together between classes, and playing soccer together on the weekends.


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Reaching Out

But how exactly should you go about reaching out to someone, especially if you don’t know them well? The thought of reaching out to a new mentor, or of doing an interview for Connected Futures, can be intimidating! But our program has lots of resources to get you started. Let’s talk about how to ask someone to talk to you about something you need help with. Here are some general ingredients that usually go into a successful request for a meeting.

  • Introduce Yourself

    Introduce yourself, and include all the relevant information the adult might need about you. Don’t necessarily assume that the adult will recognize or remember you if your previous interactions have been brief.

  • When is a good time to talk?

    Politely ask when a good time would be to have a conversation, including day, time and location, and approximately how long the meeting will last.

  • Make an Appointment

    Make an appointment for either an in-person or phone conversation. Set a date, time and place.  Try to arrange an in-person meeting if possible.

  • Thanks!

    Thank the person for their time and willingness to talk and express excitement for the meeting. For example, you could say “I look forward to talking with you.”

Networking Map

You can find a blank copy of a Networking Map in your Connected Futures Toolbox.

Pulling it all Together

Now let’s take a look at some examples to pull it all together. Think back to Jose’s situation. For one column of his Networking Map, he decided to write an email to his political science professor, Prof. Jackson. Jose has really enjoyed Prof. Jackson’s class this semester, and knows that she has a law degree. Jose thinks that Prof. Jackson could be a helpful source of information for undergraduate opportunities for research and internships in law, as well as potentially connecting him to her colleagues who are still practicing lawyers. Here is an email Jose wrote to Prof. Jackson to ask about setting up a meeting with her.

Subject: request for a meeting

Dear Professor Jackson,

I hope you had a good weekend! My name is José and I’m a third-year student in your political science course this semester. I have really enjoyed taking your class, and it has solidified my desire to pursue a career in law. I am reaching out to see whether you would be willing to meet with me some time over the next few weeks to discuss your experience as a lawyer, as well as any opportunities you may know of that would be good for me to look into. I am hoping to apply to law school after I graduate and I would love to hear about ways to get more experience in the field.

I am always free after 12:00 pm on Monday through Friday, but please let me know if there is a better time for you. I look forward to hearing from you, and thanks so much for considering meeting with me. I’ll see you in class on Tuesday!

Sincerely,
José

Asking in person, or over the phone or an Internet conferencing tool, can also be effective. View the two videos below for short examples of effective ways of asking someone to meet with you, for your interview for the Connected Futures program, or for another reason related to your interests and goals.

Reaching Out

to someone you don’t know

Billy is reaching out to someone he’s never met before – a difficult task for some! He met with a career counselor, Ms. Brown who gave him the contact information for a recent alumnus who went into his desired career, physical therapy. Ms. Brown encouraged Billy to reach out to the alumnus, Jack Hayes, to get more information about what working as a physical therapist is like.

Reaching Out

to someone you don’t know

Billy is reaching out to someone he’s never met before – a difficult task for some! He met with a career counselor, Ms. Brown who gave him the contact information for a recent alumnus who went into his desired career, physical therapy. Ms. Brown encouraged Billy to reach out to the alumnus, Jack Hayes, to get more information about what working as a physical therapist is like.

Reaching Out

to an acquaintance

Sadie is reaching out to her mom’s good friend, Mrs. Davis about her job as an investigative journalist. Sadie is around the same age as Mrs. Davis’s daughter, and knows Mrs. Davis pretty well, although they haven’t spoken much within the past year.

Reaching Out

to an acquaintance

Sadie is reaching out to her mom’s good friend, Mrs. Davis about her job as an investigative journalist. Sadie is around the same age as Mrs. Davis’s daughter, and knows Mrs. Davis pretty well, although they haven’t spoken much within the past year.

How’d they do?

Notice how Nicola and Katie both used many of the tips for reaching out to someone within a networking context. They started off the calls with a brief summary of the relevant information for the call. For Katie, it was especially important to introduce herself and give a clear explanation for why she was calling. No matter how well you know the person on the call, it’s important to be polite and flexible when scheduling the meeting, and to take responsibility for setting up the details (e.g., getting an address for the meeting location, sending out video conference links). And remember to finish up the call with a reminder about how much you appreciate the other person’s time—this can go a long way, even if it seems obvious.

Tips for writing emails requesting a meeting with someone, as well as email templates are always accessible in your toolbox if you want to view them again later! [SB: add PDF for Tips for setting up Networking Meetings to toolbox]

Tips for Requesting Meetings via Email

Tips for writing emails requesting a meeting with someone, as well as email templates are always accessible in your Connected Futures Toolbox.

How should Aya respond

It’s okay for Aya to feel disappointed or embarrassed that her professor was not available to work with her this semester. However, Ava should still respond to the email to maintain a positive relationship with this professor. Then she can move on to finding someone who is available to work with her!

Great! That’s a good option. Even if Aya is bummed about not being able to work with this professor, responding politely shows that she is still grateful that the professor took the time to respond at all. She can now brainstorm new people to reach out to that may be able to work with her.

Great! Although it may not have been the response she wanted, Aya can take this opportunity to thank the professor for responding and ask if they have any suggestions for other faculty members who may be free to work with her this semester. It never hurts to ask, and in the meantime, Ava can continue researching additional options on her own!

Why did my Professor Say No?

Let’s think back to Aya and her math professor. Aya feels really anxious when she reads the email from her professor saying that her professor is too busy to consider working with her this semester.

Emotional Support can be listening when you have a personal or private issue that is worrying you, or spending time with you when you feel down or stressed out.

Tangible Support is when someone lends or gives you something you need, or pitches in to help you with something you need to do. For example, someone runs an errand for you, lends you money, food, or clothes, or drives you somewhere you need to go.

Informational Support is giving advice or information, like helping you figure out where to get something or how to do something you need to do.
Examples of information support are guidance counseling, helping with a financial aid application, or giving you a recommendation/job reference letter.

Companionship is getting together with someone and to relax or have fun, often over shared interests. Examples of companionship are getting lunch together between classes, and playing soccer together on the weekends.

Lesson 3

4 Ingredients of a Successful Meeting

When preparing for a meeting with a potential mentor, it’s important to consider four different domains of managing a meeting or interview skillfully. Click through each of the sections below to learn more.

Emotional Support can be listening when you have a personal or private issue that is worrying you, or spending time with you when you feel down or stressed out.

Tangible Support is when someone lends or gives you something you need, or pitches in to help you with something you need to do. For example, someone runs an errand for you, lends you money, food, or clothes, or drives you somewhere you need to go.

Informational Support is giving advice or information, like helping you figure out where to get something or how to do something you need to do.
Examples of information support are guidance counseling, helping with a financial aid application, or giving you a recommendation/job reference letter.

Companionship is getting together with someone and to relax or have fun, often over shared interests. Examples of companionship are getting lunch together between classes, and playing soccer together on the weekends.

Dressing for Meetings

You can find these examples, and more, in the “Dressing for Meetings” document in your Connected Futures Toolbox. If you don’t already have a business wardrobe, it might be helpful to borrow or purchase some examples of “business casual” and “business formal” clothing items that you can have on hand for networking and other meetings. Remember that even if you’re meeting through a video-conference call, it’s important to dress and present yourself as if you were meeting in-person. Try to follow the guidelines of the particular work place you’re in, and when you’re unsure, it’s always safer to overdress rather than underdress.

The Interview: Getting Started

Now let’s talk a little more about specific tips for effective communication when you’re meeting with an adult for Connected Futures. A lot of students struggle the most with starting a meeting. They’re not sure what to say when they first meet with the other person—even if it’s someone they know fairly well! Here are some ideas:

Emotional Support can be listening when you have a personal or private issue that is worrying you, or spending time with you when you feel down or stressed out.

Tangible Support is when someone lends or gives you something you need, or pitches in to help you with something you need to do. For example, someone runs an errand for you, lends you money, food, or clothes, or drives you somewhere you need to go.

Informational Support is giving advice or information, like helping you figure out where to get something or how to do something you need to do.
Examples of information support are guidance counseling, helping with a financial aid application, or giving you a recommendation/job reference letter.

Companionship is getting together with someone and to relax or have fun, often over shared interests. Examples of companionship are getting lunch together between classes, and playing soccer together on the weekends.

A Note on Pronouns

Many colleges/universities and workplaces are moving toward more inclusive language that acknowledges that some individuals may identify with being gender nonconforming or nonbinary. These individuals may prefer gender neutral pronouns such as “they/them” instead of “he/him” or “she/her.” To acknowledge this fact, some settings invite each person to share the “personal pronouns” that they use. You may notice that some people identify their personal pronouns in their email signature, or you may meet with a potential mentor who introduces their personal pronouns along with their name (e.g., “It’s so great to meet you! I’m Dr. Julia and I use she/her pronouns.”). If you’re comfortable, it’s perfectly appropriate and respectful to respond by identifying your own pronouns. For more information, check out mypronouns.org.

The Interview: Asking Questions

OK, so let’s say you successfully got things started—what should you be doing during the meeting? Whenever you’re the one who set up a meeting, it’s important to realize that you should be asking more of the questions. So have some questions prepared ahead of time. How should you pick your questions? We’ll discuss that in just a second.

Even though you’re well-prepared, try to be flexible. Let the conversation flow. It’s okay if you don’t get to all of your questions if the person you are talking to has a lot to say in response to one question.

How can you ask good questions? Here are two main guidelines:

1. Be Clear About the Goal of the Interview
First, be clear about the goal of your interview. Are you hoping to learn more about a certain academic major/minor? Are you hoping to hear more about how to be successful on a potential career path? Or are you looking to learn more about a person’s own experiences with mentoring? Here are some examples:

For an interview with an aunt you’re close with about her experiences with mentoring you might ask: Did you have a mentor(s) or important supportive adult other than your parents in your life when you were my age? And if so, what are some of the ways this person(s) helped you out?

For an interview with a career counselor advisor about finding jobs at non-profit companies, you might ask: What would you say are the most important qualities of successful applications to work in a non-profit? What kinds of elective courses and/or academic majors do you think would be most helpful for succeeding in a non-profit career?

2. Ask Questions that Allow People to Share
Second, ask questions that allow people to share rather than to respond with yes or no.

Rather than… “Did you have any negative mentoring experiences?” you could ask… “What do you think gets in the way of mentoring relationships between college students and adults?”

Rather than… “Do you think I’d be a good fit for applying to Ph.D. programs in history?” you could ask… “What kinds of qualities do history Ph.D. programs usually look for in their applicants?”

Rather than… “Is being a marketing manager at this company fun?” you could ask… “What does a typical day look like for you?”

The Interview: Follow-up

Last, let’s talk about things to consider at the end of a meeting with someone. How should you wrap things up? What kinds of things should you make sure to discuss before leaving? Here are some ideas:

1. Be Clear About the Goal of the Interview
First, be clear about the goal of your interview. Are you hoping to learn more about a certain academic major/minor? Are you hoping to hear more about how to be successful on a potential career path? Or are you looking to learn more about a person’s own experiences with mentoring? Here are some examples:

For an interview with an aunt you’re close with about her experiences with mentoring you might ask: Did you have a mentor(s) or important supportive adult other than your parents in your life when you were my age? And if so, what are some of the ways this person(s) helped you out?

For an interview with a career counselor advisor about finding jobs at non-profit companies, you might ask: What would you say are the most important qualities of successful applications to work in a non-profit? What kinds of elective courses and/or academic majors do you think would be most helpful for succeeding in a non-profit career?

2. Ask Questions that Allow People to Share
Second, ask questions that allow people to share rather than to respond with yes or no.

Rather than… “Did you have any negative mentoring experiences?” you could ask… “What do you think gets in the way of mentoring relationships between college students and adults?”

Rather than… “Do you think I’d be a good fit for applying to Ph.D. programs in history?” you could ask… “What kinds of qualities do history Ph.D. programs usually look for in their applicants?”

Rather than… “Is being a marketing manager at this company fun?” you could ask… “What does a typical day look like for you?”

Preparing for an Interview

The “Preparing for an Interview” guide in your Toolbox summarizes these interview tips. You can always find this handout in your Toolbox.

Pro Tip: Selecting and Remembering Questions

If you want an easy way to choose and remember questions from a large pool of suggestions, you can download our Connected Futures app from the App Store to use on your smartphone. This app helps you build out entire interviews, and even record responses to those questions. 

[link to app ?]

The Interview

Thank You Notes Guide

Check out our “Thank You Notes” guide and review templates for thank you notes for different kinds of situations in your Toolbox!

Preparing for an Interview

After you finish this lesson, you will pull all these ideas together to conduct an interview of your own. Using some of the tips outlined earlier, you’ll reach out to set up a meeting, prepare your questions, and complete an interview with at least one adult. The interview could be about their experiences with mentoring, or a common area of interest (career or academic). If at all possible, you should try to do the interview in-person or as a video-conference call (rather than over the phone).

Take a few moments to get ready for your interview.

1. Be Clear About the Goal of the Interview
First, be clear about the goal of your interview. Are you hoping to learn more about a certain academic major/minor? Are you hoping to hear more about how to be successful on a potential career path? Or are you looking to learn more about a person’s own experiences with mentoring? Here are some examples:

For an interview with an aunt you’re close with about her experiences with mentoring you might ask: Did you have a mentor(s) or important supportive adult other than your parents in your life when you were my age? And if so, what are some of the ways this person(s) helped you out?

For an interview with a career counselor advisor about finding jobs at non-profit companies, you might ask: What would you say are the most important qualities of successful applications to work in a non-profit? What kinds of elective courses and/or academic majors do you think would be most helpful for succeeding in a non-profit career?

2. Ask Questions that Allow People to Share
Second, ask questions that allow people to share rather than to respond with yes or no.

Rather than… “Did you have any negative mentoring experiences?” you could ask… “What do you think gets in the way of mentoring relationships between college students and adults?”

Rather than… “Do you think I’d be a good fit for applying to Ph.D. programs in history?” you could ask… “What kinds of qualities do history Ph.D. programs usually look for in their applicants?”

Rather than… “Is being a marketing manager at this company fun?” you could ask… “What does a typical day look like for you?”

Lesson 4

Finding Support On Campus

Knowing that on-campus support is useful is one thing–but where should you go to actually find it? This will vary from school to school, and will also depend on other factors, like whether you are learning online, commuting to classes, or living on-campus.

But regardless of what college you’re attending and how you’re learning, there are several kinds of adults that work for most colleges and universities. Click through the examples below to see some common staff members on college campuses that can be helpful resources for college students.

1. Be Clear About the Goal of the Interview
First, be clear about the goal of your interview. Are you hoping to learn more about a certain academic major/minor? Are you hoping to hear more about how to be successful on a potential career path? Or are you looking to learn more about a person’s own experiences with mentoring? Here are some examples:

For an interview with an aunt you’re close with about her experiences with mentoring you might ask: Did you have a mentor(s) or important supportive adult other than your parents in your life when you were my age? And if so, what are some of the ways this person(s) helped you out?

For an interview with a career counselor advisor about finding jobs at non-profit companies, you might ask: What would you say are the most important qualities of successful applications to work in a non-profit? What kinds of elective courses and/or academic majors do you think would be most helpful for succeeding in a non-profit career?

2. Ask Questions that Allow People to Share
Second, ask questions that allow people to share rather than to respond with yes or no.

Rather than… “Did you have any negative mentoring experiences?” you could ask… “What do you think gets in the way of mentoring relationships between college students and adults?”

Rather than… “Do you think I’d be a good fit for applying to Ph.D. programs in history?” you could ask… “What kinds of qualities do history Ph.D. programs usually look for in their applicants?”

Rather than… “Is being a marketing manager at this company fun?” you could ask… “What does a typical day look like for you?”

College Support Guide

Check out a longer list of the typical supports provided by colleges in the U.S. in the“College Support Guide” in your Toolbox.

Professor Connections

To review these tips and more for connecting with professors, and review these tips at any time by navigating to the “Professor Connections” document in your Toolbox.

Connecting with Key Resources through Professors

Connecting with professors is also a great way to get to know other key adults on campus. Click through the vignettes below to hear about ways in which students were able to connect with key resources at college by speaking with their professors.

1. Be Clear About the Goal of the Interview
First, be clear about the goal of your interview. Are you hoping to learn more about a certain academic major/minor? Are you hoping to hear more about how to be successful on a potential career path? Or are you looking to learn more about a person’s own experiences with mentoring? Here are some examples:

For an interview with an aunt you’re close with about her experiences with mentoring you might ask: Did you have a mentor(s) or important supportive adult other than your parents in your life when you were my age? And if so, what are some of the ways this person(s) helped you out?

For an interview with a career counselor advisor about finding jobs at non-profit companies, you might ask: What would you say are the most important qualities of successful applications to work in a non-profit? What kinds of elective courses and/or academic majors do you think would be most helpful for succeeding in a non-profit career?

2. Ask Questions that Allow People to Share
Second, ask questions that allow people to share rather than to respond with yes or no.

Rather than… “Did you have any negative mentoring experiences?” you could ask… “What do you think gets in the way of mentoring relationships between college students and adults?”

Rather than… “Do you think I’d be a good fit for applying to Ph.D. programs in history?” you could ask… “What kinds of qualities do history Ph.D. programs usually look for in their applicants?”

Rather than… “Is being a marketing manager at this company fun?” you could ask… “What does a typical day look like for you?”

Building Connections for Online Learners or Off-Campus Students

It isn’t always easy to meet with faculty in-person. Students who take classes online from a remote location, or who commute to campus from their family’s home, have a different experience than students who live amongst their peers and take classes on campus. It can be particularly difficult to form connections with professors when you only ever meet them virtually, or when your time on campus is limited to only the hours you are attending class. Below are some tips for students who have limited or no time on campus to build in-person relationships with adults at their college or university.

1. Be Clear About the Goal of the Interview
First, be clear about the goal of your interview. Are you hoping to learn more about a certain academic major/minor? Are you hoping to hear more about how to be successful on a potential career path? Or are you looking to learn more about a person’s own experiences with mentoring? Here are some examples:

For an interview with an aunt you’re close with about her experiences with mentoring you might ask: Did you have a mentor(s) or important supportive adult other than your parents in your life when you were my age? And if so, what are some of the ways this person(s) helped you out?

For an interview with a career counselor advisor about finding jobs at non-profit companies, you might ask: What would you say are the most important qualities of successful applications to work in a non-profit? What kinds of elective courses and/or academic majors do you think would be most helpful for succeeding in a non-profit career?

2. Ask Questions that Allow People to Share
Second, ask questions that allow people to share rather than to respond with yes or no.

Rather than… “Did you have any negative mentoring experiences?” you could ask… “What do you think gets in the way of mentoring relationships between college students and adults?”

Rather than… “Do you think I’d be a good fit for applying to Ph.D. programs in history?” you could ask… “What kinds of qualities do history Ph.D. programs usually look for in their applicants?”

Rather than… “Is being a marketing manager at this company fun?” you could ask… “What does a typical day look like for you?”